Saturday, January 14, 2012

It's a new trend, Bitch.

It can really be exhausting pretending to fit in.  Don't get me wrong, I'm good at it, but I'm silently judging you while I pretend to belong in your group.  Luckily, my lifetime of crafting lies terminological inexactitudes has prepared me for situations like this.  I work at a small hotel in a rich neighborhood. Although I may LOOOOOVE expensive things (go ahead, call me a brand whore, I don't give a shit) I am far from rich...  I mean, I'm living out of my car, for fuck's sake! 

Working at the front desk of a hotel makes me the person you go to if you want any sort of recommendation (or apparently lube, but I digress).  People ask about restaurants most of the time, and I'm familiar enough with the area that I can make a decent recommendation if you tell me what you're in the mood for.  However, this being an expensive neighborhood catering to "well off" clientele means that most of the restaurants nearby are quite costly.  These restaurants don't have dollar menus, so I can't eat there.  Here's where the terminological inexactitudes come in.

If you want seafood, I'll point you to the most popular (very expensive) seafood restaurant up the street.  If you want steak, I'll point you to the most popular (even MORE expensive) steakhouse right by the seafood place.  I can even recommend a little hidden gem you're going to LOVE, no matter what you're in the mood for.  I'll tell you the food is amazing.  I've never eaten the food.  You're asking the college student who works at the front desk of a hotel.  If you ask my personal preference in this class of restaurants, I'm going to lie to you.  I cannot afford to sample the cuisine at every high end dining establishment in the vicinity, especially when there are SOOO MANYYYY!!!  If you ask me about the bars, however, wellllllll... ;P

But don't we all do this?  People pretend to be educated in subjects they know nothing about all the time, especially when trying to prove a point (just listen to politicians!). A girl will pretend to like sports to win over a fanatic. Parents pretend to know the answers to off the wall questions their kids ask.  And it even goes deeper than that.  Girls crop their facebook photos or take them at certain angles to make themselves appear thinner.  And have you ever overheard someone slip out of their customer service voice when they didn't think you could hear?  They aren't so sweet sounding, are they?

As for me?  I pretend to fit in with the rich.  My glasses are Dolce & Gabbana.  Every article of clothing I'm currently wearing was purchased at Nordstrom, Express, or Victoria's Secret. My purse is Coach. My watch is Citizen, and yes, those are diamonds.  My wardrobe is expensive and I wouldn't have it any other way.  I fit in perfectly in this area and my customers come back and thank me for the wooonnnnnnderful restaurant recommendations all the time.  

And then there are days like today.  Days when I think my cute little flats are in my backseat, and I arrive at work and realize I've left them at one of the houses I'm crashing at.

Sometimes a little bit of Kat creeps into Katrina's world, and I'm okay with that. 

1 comment:

  1. That's the bitch I know and love. So glad you are back! :)